12 October 2014

Relationship: How Mine Keeps Flourishing

Una Doh o!
I recently travelled to Warri, and that is their greeting pattern. In fact, almost everything they say is "Doh". For instance, situations that warrant you to say 'Sorry', they will say Doh, 'well done' is doh, 'thank you' is doh. I think I like how it sounds... And I kinda have internalised it. Another word I learnt there is 'meegwuor'. Seems like it's their greeting pattern because whenever two persons meet that's the first thing they say. What I don't know is the response...care to help?

Ok, enough! My apologies for the boring epistle.

Now, to the main gist!
Whenever I see couples fighting or having an argument, The first thing that comes in my mind is: I will never allow arguments to set in my relationship (especially when I get married), or will never think to start one, but arguments seem to come naturally.

We argue about who called each other last, or who used a wrong tense in a sentence during discussions, etc. Sometimes, more than that, but regardless of our reasons for the argument (or fight), patching up a troubled relationship and having a solution is very important.

Second to God, our partners are a believer's most valuable asset. Companions provide a listening ear for our troubles, support for our dreams, and a safety net when we fall. They give us love, even when we are unlovable. They are, and must be our friends. Over the years, I have come to the understanding of what LOVE truly is, and the value of being in a relationship.

Though, sometimes we go through troubled periods and solutions were sought through the following steps:

NB: please note that these are tips that worked for me.

Address the problem.
Acknowledge to your partner that something is amiss and needs to be fixed.

Determine the problem.
Together, discuss where the relationship veered off-course and what wrongs may have been spoken or committed. Be honest and let your honesty be in its proper place. Remember, you are talking to your partner, another half of yourself. Yes!

As believers, we accept responsibility for our actions and seek forgiveness.

Refuse to blame.
In addition, you must avoid defending yourselves. There could be a temptation to argue over who did what; however, the goal is not proving who is right but saving the relationship.

Begin repairs.
Ask, "What can I do to rebuild our closeness?" The key here is to do willingly whatever is requested.

Commit to rebuilding.
Start investing your time, energy, and love in restoring the relationship.
In other to have the blessings of a good relationship with a partner who accepts and loves you, you must be willing to pay the high price of patching things up. Walking away might seem easier, but in the long run, you would lose a valuable treasure.

God bless you both.
Have a blessed Sunday, and a fruitful week ahead!
Thank you so much for reading.

Now, it's your turn to write!
What steps have you taken to restore your relationship/marriage back to life, or what steps keep you both happy ever after?


  1. In as much as we are two in a relationship, the feeling has to be mutual for things to go well/right. I argue & i have a bad temper, i am single tho but i know i should always talk to my partner about everything, i know i should be faithful & honest etc. Communication is KEY! and you must learn to understand & tolerate each other. The best is for you to find what works and everything will fall in place...


  2. Thanks for this Catherine.
    Having a meek and gentle Spirit also helps...

    And nice to hear that you loved warri.
    And when some says "migwo" you say "vredo".
    Like "migwo" is "i'm on my knees", "vredo" is "stand up, doh".
    But now,peple don't kneel again sha. Another thing is that na only who senior you you go greet migwo oh.

    1. Thanks dear for the enlightenment... Shebi the V vredo is silent?
      Ehen... Commenting on ur blog has not been that easy o, what happened?after sweating and typing commentsn when I hit the publish button, the comment vanishes... Could it be my device?


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